Season 3 Episode 1 “Hello New Year! Let’s Build a Morning Routine”
LOLA: We are in a whole new year and I’m not even going to go into the whole oh my gosh I can’t believe it’s a whole new year blah blah blah. We all know it’s 2022, so let’s just see how this year shakes out. It’s 3 days away from valentine’s day and I’m coming back in the month of love. Makes sense cause this podcast is all about loving yourself, lol. Do y’all celebrate the holiday? Is it really a holiday, lol? I feel like candy companies definitely are behind this holiday as well as a few others, lol. I really only love the adorable target décor and Brach’s valentines’ hearts, and of course chocolate. But ya girl won’t say no to a gift especially if its jewelry or something on my wish list, lmao.
LOLA: Hey y’all and welcome back to the podcast! If this is your first episode, hello and welcome! I’m Lola and I’m glad you’re here.
I hate trendy names like Boss Babe, THAT GIRL, whatever, whatever, it’s way too many trends and names for shit nowadays but nevertheless, the kind of life I’m trying to live according to the internet is called being THAT GIRL. Ok whatever, a lot of these trendy names are just for the hype but for those that actually wanna do the work to actually live that aesthetic then here we go. Every other year it’s like you’re either setting resolutions, making promises to yourself and Facebook. I’m not doing any of that this year. It’s usually like this is gonna be my year and then as we’ve seen for the last like what 2-3 years running now it ain’t been nobody’s year really, lol. Yes, there’s definitely been some triumphs and wins but let me tell you the world has definitely seen some failures.
Between a pandemic and all these weird TikTok challenges kids are doing now and just all the craziness that has been flowing through the world in the last few years it’s just been a hot mess. So, for 2022 I’m not going to be out here like oh I’m setting these resolutions, I’m going to do this by this date, no. I learned a lot about myself this past year in 2021. I also learned that I have to stop pointing the blame when things don’t go my way if I haven’t done all the things, I need to do in order to get what I want. Because when I really look back and think about it. I haven’t done all that I can to get where I want to be. Some of the time I had a pity party for myself. Which clearly helped nothing. So instead of pointing blame and setting resolutions I’m not going to follow through on. I’m writing down the things that I want to accomplish this year, creating my vision boards on Pinterest and in my planner and I’m going to work towards those things this year.
I feel like we put a lot more pressure on ourselves also when we focus super hard on the word “resolutions“ because everyone’s like well it’s a New Year’s resolution so I have to do it, I already said I would, I told everybody and after that it kind of becomes a chore because it’s sort of expected in a way because you’ve already said it and you already put it out there and you ran your trap about it 400 times and you said you were going to get that gym membership so now you have to do it and now it just becomes one more thing that’s a chore or a to-do rather than something that you want to do to help change or better your life.
I took time to reflect. I found some new books, I put together a new daily routine, and I plan on holding myself to it to see how I do. If I wanna become THAT GIRL this year than the excuses and bs gotta go. Which means no more staying up Hella late just because hubby is still awake or playing around and procrastinating scrolling on my phone in the mornings before I peel myself out of bed for the day.
I don’t want to hate mornings or Mondays. I don’t know why that became such a norm thing. Like ugh, I have to wake up again?! There’s a new week again?! Like your life is definitely going to be much more intolerable if you look at everything as chore rather than a blessing or a chance for a new start. I think hating Mondays really just comes from the 9-5 grind. People having to get up and go to jobs they hate or they may love the job but can’t stand their coworkers or boss. Maybe it’s a stay-at-home parent who can’t tell days from nights anymore from sleep deprivation. Maybe you’re caring for a sick or elderly family member or friend and the days and times are blurring together. But whatever it is, hating Monday’s is like a worldwide known phenomenon, lol. T-shirts, mugs, etc. all collectively hating 1 day in the week. But I want to love Monday’s just like every other day of the week. I want to love my life and to do those things you gotta change your attitude about your life in general.
I took the month of January to just reboot. I did the annoying thing they tell you to do with your computer. You know, I turned it off and turned it back on so to speak, lol. I hit that reset button because honestly shit was getting chaotic, especially in my brain. My adhd was on 100 and I was feeling so overwhelmed and exhausted. I couldn’t get anything done fully. My household things got done but they were done so sporadically. I felt like a robot. Just kind of going with the notions you know? My business was just kind of hanging there, my blog had been non-existent, I have a stack of books I need to start and finish reading, an online class I need to finish taking, my social media was like a smorgasbord of everything, and the podcast needed work too. But I just couldn’t get my mind right. The more I tried to fix things, the more chaotic things became in my mind. Like when you try and wipe glitter off the table and even though you have a wet rag and kept it all in a neat pile under the rag you somehow got glitter all over the palm of your hand and the more you try and get rid of it the more glitter appears everywhere. Yeah, that was my brain, a billion tabs open and idk where the music is coming from. Anxiety was a real bitch for me, lol.
So, I decided that I needed a redo, a refresh so to speak and what better time to do it then the beginning of a new year? So, I’m doing a few things to change my habits for good. If I want things to change, grow, and be better than I have to be the one to make those changes. So, starting a better and healthier routine is what I plan on doing.
The pandemic as a whole from start to finish just demolished any sort of schedule I had at one point. With no one going into work, my kids in and out of digital learning days, and everything else happening in the mix it’s a wonder many of us aren’t in strait jackets, lol. So, I’ve been doing some research, reading up on ways to change my routine. One book that I started reading to start the year is Atomic Habits by James Clear. The introduction has been interesting and now I’m about to get into chapter one so when I finish the book, I’ll share it to see if anything in it has helped me. But aside from that, clearly a routine is necessary. Like it’s real childish to me when adults don’t want to follow any sort of schedule. Whether you work from home, you’re a stay-at-home parent, or your self-employed everyone needs some sort of schedule. For me I thrive much better on a schedule but lately I’ve totally fallen off of that which is why my brain is a mess.
Some routines can be more successful than others. For me when I put too many things on a schedule it can be overwhelming. So, the key is to make sure your routine works for you and is something you’re going to follow through on is making sure it fits you. Routines are important because most of success is the result of small actions over long periods of time. It’s not possible to rise to the top in a week, unless you go viral on the internet or something, lol. But it’s much easier to have more exciting results with a more effective routine. If you think about the segments of your life that are repeated daily like going to work either in an office or at home. There’s getting ready for work, the first part of work, the last part of work, and then your evening routine. The segments of your day may not be “work” so to speak. Maybe you’re in grade school, maybe you’re about to go to college or you’re already there. Whatever your routine, think of the things you have to do on a daily basis, you already have these as a routine so you just need to work on the rest of the goals you want to achieve and find a way to work those into your routine.
When you think about developing a new habit or routine a lot of times people automatically assuming it’s going to be some time consuming, life altering thing when it’s really just small things that are 2-30 minutes long. The benefit of 30-minute routines over months and years is amazing. Consistently being on time, prepared, and spending your time intelligently and productively separates the successful from the average. One thing that’s constantly said is “I don’t have the time” but realistically, if you think you can’t spare the time, keep in mind that you’re already spending the time, lol. You also already have routines. If you purposefully construct routines that make sense it will be much more effective.
“The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand.”
LOLA: First things first in creating a routine that works for you is just that, getting a routine that in fact works for YOU. A medical student isn’t going to have the same routine as an office worker, just like a professional athlete wouldn’t have the same routine as a professional gamer. Everyone has a different schedule or priorities so a tailored routine is the best way to get where you’re trying to be. If you aren’t clear on your goals yet, then you need to take the time to give them some thought. If you break down your goals then it will be easier to work towards them and you can see your progress too.
So, let’s start by breaking your goals down into 4 categories: Health/Fitness, Finances, Career, and Relationships. You can include any other categories or areas in your life that are important to you but these are the usually the main ones. So, let’s break them down now. For Health/Fitness you want to write down your goals like Do you need to lose some weight? Drop your blood pressure? Gain weight or build muscle? For me my ultimate goal is weight gain but I just have to get physical again period. My fitness has been in the crapper for years. I bought a yoga mat from Target and I plan on finding a yoga class I can take at home. But finding what your goals are will better help you achieve them in the long run.
Then there’s Finances. Do you have financial goals? Are you primarily interested in reducing your debt? Are you saving for a house or a new car? College? Write out all the things you want to see change in your finances and then work towards that.
Next is Career. What’s your ideal job and salary? Do you have the training and knowledge to accomplish that? Can you get there within your current company or job title? Do you want to be self-employed? Figure out our career goals and write down where you want to be career wise.
Finally, there’s Relationships. Are you happy in your current relationship? Are you single and looking to find the one? How are your friendships going? How are things between your other family members and yourself? Are your work relationships going well? Write out some relationship goals you want to achieve and put those down.
Once you get all of your goals down and in front of you then you can start to work them into a routine that works for you. You want to make sure you’re developing routines around achieving your goals.
Now that we know how to break down and assess our goals. Let’s look into some routines and how to figure one out that works for you.
“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.” -Bruce Lee
LOLA: So obviously your daily routine is going to start in the morning. So, a morning routine is what we’re going to start with first. By now we all know that having a good morning helps set the rest of the day. I know when my morning starts off great the rest of my day just kind of glides on by. Like things just seem to go smoother when the morning is set off right. But when my morning starts off like shit then I can pretty much guarantee the rest of my day will be rocky in comparison. So, I know for a fact that I have to get my morning routine right because if it’s off the rest of my days drag.
Most morning routines are haphazardly designed to allow for getting up as late as possible while barely making it on time for whatever it is you have to do that day. Clearly that doesn’t make a successful start to the day when you’re already planning ways to wake up and start your day as late as possible. So, to have a success enhancing morning the first thing you have to do is Get up on time. If you’re routinely late, hit the snooze button a million times (Kevin I’m looking at you) omg idk if it’s just my husband or what but I swear that man will set an alarm and hit the damn snooze button 53 times before he actually gets up. he usually gets up right before I’ve come to terms with my prison sentence in my mind because I murdered him for that damn alarm clock. (I think my chances for an insanity plea will for sure hold up in court, right? lol) Anyway, the point is getting up on time will clearly start your day in the right direction.
You need to start by making sure your alarm is somewhere you have to either sit up and reach or get up to turn it off. You want to make sure you’re up in time enough to do everything you need to before starting your day for work, school, parenting, whatever. You want to give yourself plenty of time to complete your morning routine and setting your alarm appropriately is where to start.
Morning hygiene is the next thing. Are your grooming habits appropriate for your goals? Are you getting up in just enough time to brush your teeth and grab all your stuff to run out the door? I remember I used to literally have to get ready in the car or at work because my routine did not include any self-care time for me. I got up in time enough to get my kids to school and then after that it was worry about me later. But the days that I woke up earlier or I was awake earlier than usual I had plenty of time to do everything I wanted to do and sometimes some extra. I also got places earlier and all that.
Sure, your current routine might be acceptable for your current position or what you’re currently doing every day but does your routine reflect the position of your dreams? When you read books, articles, listen to podcasts, etc. and they’re talking about the person you admire or the woman you see as THAT GIRL, do they have a routine like yours? Are they hitting snooze 17 times before they start the day? Do you wanna avoid being the person that shaves every other day or refuses to give up the hairstyle that went out of style 15 years ago because you don’t want to take the extra time it takes to make yourself presentable? Do you want to brush your teeth and do your make up and your hair and get ready before you walk out the door or would you like to get ready in your car like an influencer on a shoot every day?
Make sure your morning routine has enough time in it to use the bathroom, brush your teeth, get your skincare routine going for the day which my morning skincare routine is a lot less complicated than before because you don’t need to do much in the morning. But anyway, making sure you have enough time pull yourself together for the day actually makes me feel a lot more accomplished in the morning too because I don’t have to stress about whether I look presentable or not if I run into someone or have an emergency or something I have to run out for. I don’t have that extra stress of thinking great now I have to pull myself together for xyz because its already done.
Once you’ve gotten dressed and did your morning hygiene routine then you move on to the next part of the morning. For me in the morning I like to meditate and take the time to say an affirmation or something to bring some positivity in the morning. I also want to start doing yoga in the morning to stretch my body and wake it up and start some sort of physical routine as well. This is also a great time to journal or write down anything that you want to accomplish in the week, things you’re grateful for, and review your goals. You want to sit down and go over your goals as much as possible and kind of review and reflect to make sure you are on the right track. How many times have we said a New Year’s Revolution or something and we forget about it a week later? You want to keep your mind focused on the prize by reviewing them each day.
Then after you’ve done your morning hygiene routine, your manifestation, meditation, and goal reviews or whatever you choose to do in the morning. Then you want to eat breakfast, this is actually hard for me because I’m not a breakfast person I usually start eating during lunchtime. But I’m trying to at least incorporate a fruit and some tea or something in the morning. I’ve cut back on coffee so one cup of coffee a day, some tea, and some fruit. It at least will give me some sort of breakfast fuel to start my day. I definitely still have a love-hate relationship with breakfast but I am working on it.
Once you’ve gotten your morning hygiene routine done, we’ve done our manifestation meditation and we’ve eaten breakfast, now you want to make sure that you have everything you need for the day. Are you waking up kids to get them ready for school are you making lunches are you getting ready for work, do you have a meeting? You want to make sure that you have everything you need to start your day so you want to do a quick check before you know heading out the door or heading into your office. And then just taking one last look in the mirror or whatever going over the checklist this is the time that you want to make sure that you’ve gotten everything that you need to get done in your morning routine so that your day can start off smooth and you aren’t rushing and don’t feel like you’re forgetting something. Most of us have to get ready for work or something several days in a week so optimizing your morning routine is the perfect way to make sure that your routine is supporting your objectives and your goals. Morning routines are definitely the most challenging to change especially if you are stuck in a pandemic rut like myself where your schedule just completely went kaput. But with a really good schedule and routine it is easier for you to outperform the person in the next cubicle so to speak.
If you arrive at work, show up in your business, show up to brunch on time, be present in class, or even just showing up at home with family matters a little better prepared, a little more energetic and cheerful and looking your best it’s always a slight improvement in many areas that can easily make a huge difference. I think small changes over time will improve the likelihood of lasting change if you add one thing to your morning routine until it becomes easier to perform and then it just becomes a habit, that’s how you can build a more successful routine.
So, these are my tips for building your THAT GIRL morning routine. Y’all, know I hate trendy names but that’s what it is. Please just keep in mind that everyone is different and it takes trial and error before you perfect your routine. No one has a perfect routine overnight. This is not a Disney movie. It’s not magic and nobody is coming to save you at the last second. You’ve got to do the work yourself and that means playing around with your routine until it sticks and its working for you. I’m working on so much at the moment. I’m doing a brand overhaul for all of my stuff. Blogging, podcast, digital products. I’m taking the month of January to make sure I have all of my ducks in a row. Next week I’m going to be sharing how to create a work routine. Whether you’re self-employed or you have a boss, making sure you have a great work routine falls right in line with having a good morning routine. If you start your day off right you want to continue on in the day like that and the best way is to have a good work routine.
I want to start ending the podcasts with a positive. So, let’s all think about something were grateful for each week. Don’t try and bs it with like oh I’m grateful for the sun or some shit. Be serious about it. For me I am grateful for ______ this week.
Alright y’all, that’s it for this episode. I’m so excited to be back and for the podcast to be in Season 3.
As always thank you so much for listening to the podcast. Thank you for the support in the last 2 seasons. If you haven’t already, please rate and leave ya girl a written review on iTunes, apple podcasts. Let me know you’re listening and you love it.
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Alright y’all, until next week. Always Remember You’re Beautiful! Lola.